Good morning, and happy Friday everyone. We’re back and ready to have a bit of fun this week. Now, the easy thing to do this week would be to talk about the NFL and the referees, and you, THAT game. But no, other than that one gratuitous reference, that’s in the past and we’re gonna have some fun with some of the other, lesser covered stories of the week. Let’s see what we have on tap, shall we?
- Last week, we mocked a security official taking a gun through an airport security check. Well, now it’s happened again. A flight attendant brought a loaded gun through a security checkpoint. No, at this point, I’m not surprised that it’s happened again. It obviously happens way more than it should. So let me just put it this way….
I’m worried about the gun, sure! But shouldn’t a POLICE officer be able to unload the thing without it going off?!?!?!?!?
Then again, maybe not.
- My original thought was to file this under “What did you expect”, which is technically correct. Of course, that also places it squarely in the “This is news, how?” category. Right along the lines of “Breaking News! The Sun Rises in the East this morning!” What am I going on about? A man was mauled at the Bronx Zoo after jumping from an elevated monorail into the zoo’s tiger pit. Okay, let’s add another thought here… This seemed like a good idea to someone? Best quote of the article though comes from the Zoo director, “The tiger did nothing wrong in this case at all”. Good kitty.
- Speaking of filing stories under certain headings or categories…. This one could go under “Everybody Panic!”, “We’re Doomed!”, or even “The Mayans Were Right!” What am I talking about? The fact that there is a projected bacon shortage! They’re saying it appears unavoidable, which means all the “healthy alternatives” will probably be offered up. Fortunately, there’s a video that shows how to correctly deal with this nightmare scenario.
- I knew the moment I saw this next one that it would be going into today’s post. It doesn’t really even fit any discernible theme, but I’m using it anyways. How could I resist a story about a city asking all of its residents to collectively flush their toilets at the same time? And of course, me being me, this song poped into my head while reading the headline.
- And lastly, let’s finish with a story about stopping. Stopping what, exactly? Well, it’s a story about stopping your car. BEFORE you drive it into the nearest Florida post office. Yes, it seems that vehicle / post office collisions have become such a problem in Florida that the US Postal Service has issued guidelines to help avoid hitting a post office should one, you know, jump out in front of you. (You think I’m making this up, but that really is a legit article)
Alright folks, that’s five and it’s time to focus on my favorite part of the week. The weekend. So no matter what your plans are for the weekend, make sure you “Take Five” and just sort of chill for a bit.
Have a great weekend folks!