Monthly Archives: October 2012

Happy Halloween (a rerun?)

Happy Halloween everyone!  Because of the holiday, I wanted to write a quick post about the holiday, but as Beer knows…I’m too lazy.  So I began to wonder, if TV shows can get away with…can you rerun a blog?  Then I figured, nah..that’s too cheesy…so I decided to do like some of the old cartoons and three stoogies episodes…I’ll splice some old content with a bit of new and call it a new blog!

Here are some tips for the Halloween Trick or Treaters tonight:

* If you’re holding hands with anyone but your parents or grandparents while treat or treating….you’re probably too old.

* If you’re talking on a cell phone while coming up to my door holding out your bag…you’re probably too old to trick or treat.

* If you have boobs that would make a super model jealous and they aren’t balloons or another fake item…you’re probably too old to trick or treat.

* If your costume consist of a basketball jersey and a basketball…you’re probably too old to trick or treat.

*If your brother/sister is sick or grounded and you were carrying a bag for them….they probably shouldn’t get any candy for a reason.

*If you’re going to put up a huge halloween display weeks before, you probably want to actually be there to pass out candies on the actual day.

*I get it if you don’t believe in the holiday, no worries, but to leave your light on and trick the kids into coming to hear the “word”….wrong.

*I also get it if your neighborhood is so bad that you have to take your kids somewhere else so they can be safe. But come on…..park the car and walk with them! This driving along side of the road as they go house to house is cheesy.

*Finally, in these tough times, I get the buying the cheapest candy possible. I also get that you are only giving out one piece of bubblegum as a treat. I just want to thank those people that go against the grain and actually still give out bags of potato chips….You guys are awesome!

Now I’ll leave you with a bit of Detroit Nostalgia:

 

VERSUS!

Cheesiest SuperHero TV Show

FIGHT!

The Amazing Spider-Man

VS.
Batman

VS.
Captain America

VS.
Hulk

Five Thoughts on a Friday – The “Mother Nature Has a Sense of Humor” Edition

Hello everyone and welcome to my first ever edition, solo that is, of Five Thoughts on a Friday. I am sure you all are aware that Beer has decided that not one, not two, but many boondoggles in one calendar year is not nearly enough. So why waste any more time let’s get right down to it shall we?

  1. To start the theme off correctly every time I see something a little off I seem to have a thought bubble come up and say “Come on man really???” Nothing says this more then when a live tiger shark decides to go Felix Baumgartnerand somehow fly through the air land on a golf course. It made it back to the water 4 miles away thanks to some quick thinking course workers. Take that Felix the shark did it without a parachute.
  2. I am a lover of animals. I like dogs because they are entertaining in many ways but sometimes I wonder who the more intelligent species is. Take for instance the pug that decides to take a lick off a baby bottle filled with breast milk and likes it. Now add a woman that thinks “Hey what a great idea. I will let my dog breast feed to make me feel like a better mom.”
  3. Storms are a great source of humor in many ways. Forecasters are never wrong and weather never changes on a dime. Well when there is a headline like “Frankenstorm” you know life as we know it will end. We had the Perfect Storm but a Frakenstorm how will the world survive? 
  4. This time I think man has gone too far with its pursuit of making people cringe. Mother Nature I am sure of is sitting back and shaking her head saying “What the hell are they thinking?” If someone is having issues with natures calling on a daily basis that is a problem. Take some guy sitting around thinking how do we get someone to go #2 without any issues? Take poop bacteria from a healthy person and inject it into the unhealthy persons poop. How do you think the posting for test subjects looked on that one?
  5. Finally we find out that even Mother Nature doesn’t like the police sometimes and has animals take care of business for her. Take a couple of moose in an intersection of a small town in Canada, mix in a Canadian Mountie in a vehicle and bingo you have a road rage incident. As the old saying goes, mess with the Bull (moose that is) and you get your car mashed.

Well folks I hope you enjoy this PB’s first edition of Five Thoughts. I will hope to do better next time and judging by Beer’s boondoggle schedule there will be plenty more to come. And as always try to figure out why Mother Nature had us wondering why must I chase the cat. Must be the dog in me.

Useless internet item of the week

I’m just speechless by this video…….at the same point, I can’t stop watching it.

 

 

VERSUS!!

FIGHT!!

The Simpsons

VS.
Family Guy

VS.
The Flintstones

VS.
The Jetsons

Five Thoughts on a Friday – The “Jump, Jump Jump” Edition

Howdy folks, and happy Friday. Here we are at the start of yet another weekend, and Beer’s likely last post before yet another boondoggle (That right! You get a guest writer next week!), so what’s on the agenda this week? Let’s get started and find out, shall we?

  1. Let’s drop this one in right off the bat. This one went down last Sunday, so we’re just getting a chance to talk about it now, but Felix Baumgartner is the man. Period. End of discussion. When you jump from the edge of space back down to earth with only a parachute, you win. (See what I did there? “Drop in”? “Went Down”? Get it? No? Okay, nevermind.)
  2. Almost equally impressive, if possible, was the speed at which a Lego recreation of the Stratos jump made its way online. Impressive and disturbing at the  same time. Someone apparently has a LOT of Legos. And too much time on their hands.
  3. While we’re on the subject of jumps and jumping. There are jumps you want to see, and jumps you don’t want to see. And a 600 pound marlin jumping INTO the boat is definitely on the “Don’t want to see” list. Unless you’re watching it on the video.
  4. There’s some crude language at one point, so you might want to turn the sound down for this next one. But talk about a jump (Or more specifically, a cannonball dive) gone wrong
  5. Lastly, there was some jumping around last night. As you may, or may not have based on the near exclusive coverage of the losing team on national radio programs, heard about the Detroit Tigers sweeping the New York Yankees. When the game ended, there was indeed much jumping. And one spike. No, not a baseball spike. In a game decided by 7 runs, as the final out was recorded, Phil Coke spiked his baseball glove like a football. Yep. As they advanced to the World Series… the term to use was… Touchdown Phil Coke!

Okay folks, that’s five and I’m off to enjoy a (hopefully!) quiet weekend. See you after the boondoggle! In the mean time, keep jumping around!

Have a great weekend folks!
-Beer

Five Thoughts on a Friday – The “A Bit of Housekeeping” Edition

Happy Friday folks! We were going to lead off with a “Cleaning House” Edition but I didn’t want anyone thinking that we were looking to fire anyone. Nope, that’s not the case at all. It’s just been a bit of a quiet week here so I figured I’d take the chance to tidy up a few loose ends and all. So, let’s see what we can dust off for today….

  1. I’m not a big east coast vs west coast type of guy. Probably because I don’t really consider myself ‘from’ either of them. But as someone who does reside in the eastern time zone, I do want to point out that the folks out west have a distinct advantage when watching the late start MLB playoff games like I did last night. Sheesh….
  2. Back in August I posted the “Beer and Brownie” edition of Five Thoughts.  Well, I made the beer. And my friend Kirsten at Comfortably Domestic made black and tan brownies with it. And I got to try them. And, to borrow a line from Seinfeld… “They’re real, and they’re spectacular
  3. Speaking of beer, I’m all for going out and getting a beer… hopping on your bike while wielding a machete to crash a young girls’ birthday party is a bit much. But when you see the first word in the body of the article it starts to make more sense. That word? Florida. Why is it always Florida?
  4. Since we’ve talked about beer, and brownies (made with beer), why not throw in some chocolate, too? Especially when we’re talking about a headline like this… “Eat more chocolate, win more Nobels?” I think we’ve now hit the trifecta today… Beer, Brownies, and Chocolate.
  5. One of my co-bloggers has taken up posting old school TV commercials once a week on twitter. I keep telling him he needs to do it as a blog feature (hint, hint). He hasn’t been listening to me, so I guess it’s time to retaliate the only way I know how. Boondoggle Time! That’s right, Beer has planned not one, not two, but THREE boondoggles before the end of the year. I’m going to make him write one way of the other. He’ll like that. So, in the upcoming weeks, which location is more likely to generate boondoggle stories:
    Toronto, Chicago, or Myrtle Beach? We’re about to find out. And yes, some of these boondoggles are beer related. More to follow as the boondoggles occur.

Okay, that’s a somewhat subdued five on a day when I’m operating on less than enough sleep but that’s alright, we’re off to enjoy the weekend. This isn’t the end of the line, it’s the starting line!

Have a great weekend folks!
-Beer