Tag Archives: Boobies

Five Thoughts on a Friday – The “Shoot! I forgot the title!” Edition

Howdy folks! If we’re posting this, it must be Friday! It’s been a relatively quiet week for us here, but I haven’t heard anyone complaining. So, where do we go from here? Well, let’s get started and find out, shall we?

  1. I’ve said before that often times I know something is gonna make one of these posts as soon as I see it. I’ve also said before that sometimes the posts just write themselves. And then there are times like this, where you just know a story about two women trying stuff $60,000 in cash into their bras and cross the border needs to be a Five Thoughts item, but there’s just no way to improve upon the basic description. So there you go.
  2. Okay, given the misadventures of some of my co-bloggers, and our general sophomoric senses of humor in general, there was no way a list of 14 Places you have to poop before you die was going to not make the list as soon as we found out about it. I’ll have to leave it to the others to comment on the quality of said list, however.
  3. I’m sorry.. kind of. I know this is a serious subject, and that there are lives in the balance. It’s just that this seems like something I would have seen in a Looney Tunes cartoon while I was growing up. Not something played out in a court of law in real life! It appears that there is an inmate in Death Row trying to get his reprieve overturned. He doesn’t want it. And as I was reading the article all I can think of is….
  4. Sometimes, life imitates art. Other times, apparently it imitates an old Saturday Night Live skit. As in the case of a Chicago Blackhawks fan who suffered a heart attack while watching one of the games of this years Stanley Cup final matchup. 
  5. Lastly, I’m a bit bummed that the scheduling didn’t workout better. Last weekend, the latest Superman movie franchise re-boot came out. I haven’t seen it. I’m not sure I even will. But it has me bummed. If it would have come out one weekend later, it would have coincided with the largest full moon of the year. The “Supermoon”. And then we could have played the whole “it’s a bird, it’s a plane… It’s Supermoon?” routine. You know, “Superman, Supermoon”. Somehow, I don’t think it would work any better than David Letterman’s “Uma / Oprah” bit though.

Okay, that’s five and I’m ready to call it a week. How do I know it’s time to go? Because, I use the formatting to tell me how many things I’ve posted on. Yep, it knows how to add it up. Hmmm… Add it Up. You know, I’ve been taking flak from some people about my song choices, lately so that gives me an idea. No, I’m not going with that one, but I think it’s about time the Violent Femmes make an appearance here. In the meantime, until next week I’m “Gone Daddy Gone“.

Have a great weekend folks!
-Beer

Five Thoughts on a Friday – The “Late Start” editon

Good morning folks, and welcome to the Friday post that almost wasn’t. Yep, you read that correctly. There almost wasn’t a post today. Why? Well, let’s get rolling on today’s five and you’ll find out.

  1. Yes, I got a late start today. Even if I had gotten an early start, I would not have been prepared for what I saw in a Yahoo! sports blog today. An NFL nose tackle (AKA “A very large human being”), driving a Hello Kitty smart car. Let me say that again…

    An NFL nose tackle, driving a Hello Kitty smart car.

  2. Moving right along….
    I feel bad for this person, I really do. A man was attacked and severely injured in a shark attack. But I can’t help thinking to myself… “The beach was CLOSED due to shark sightings”. In an area known for great white sharks and shark attacks. You ignored the signs. Not Smart.
  3. I got this from my co-blogger earlier in the week. Originally I thought it screamed “This will not end well”. New York Abandons Eye Exams For Driver’s Licenses. Then I drove home, and I realized that in truth – it isn’t gonna make a bit of difference.
  4. You can spin the reasoning any way you want – I say it’s nothing but a way to get your name back in the headlines. You know,  get publicity. And I’m fine with that. After all, I’m using it as a cheap excuse to talk about boobies! “Holly Madison insures her breasts for $1 million
  5. Okay… Now, why did we almost not have a post today? Because I was almost still in bed. Unintentionally. Yes, today was one of those days that we’ve all had at least once before in our life. You sort of half wake up thinking it’s the middle of the night (or in some cases the daylight tips you off that something is amiss) and blurrily look over at the clock. And you realize that the time staring back at you is far later than it should be and your alarm did not go off. So yeah – the resulting “Oh $h*t” moment was enough to jump start my day and get me going. At least until I got into the office and got some coffee. LOTS of coffee. Even though yesterday was actually National Coffee Day.

Okay folks, that’s a quick five (again, apologies but it needed to be a rush job today) and it’s time for me to head off and get ready for another exciting, home improvement filled weekend!

Until then – let’s go with a little Alan Jackson music for a change a pace on the way out.

Have a great weekend folks!
-Beer

Five Thoughts on a Friday – The “Deep Fried Turkey” edition

Howdy folks!

Ripping through another week, we’ve arrived at Friday once again. Now, I don’t want to brag, but after today deal old Beermaker only has one more full workweek left before a much anticipated holiday break. Feel free to hate.

As a side note, I’m toying with the possibility of some alternate  posting schedules for the rest of the year. So don’t be surprised if things get shuffled a little bit. Anyways… let’s get started, shall we?

  1. The Charlie Brown Thanksgiving special was on last night. And the Christmas sugar cookies have made their annual appearance here at the office. I swear, those little things are every bit as addictive as crack. Screw the potato chips, try eating just one of those damned cookies. Heck, you crave more before you even have the first one!
  2. I’m not going to justify what the person did as right, legal, or anything… but really now ladies… If you’re at a bar, and someone is offering to give you a breast exam for free, how exactly does that NOT come across as some sort of come on or something? Even if the other person *is* (or in this case, at least claims to be) a woman? Seriously now!
  3. Yesterday was the IPO for the all new GM (General Motors) stock. If you somehow got in at the actual IPO price  of $33.oo you did ok. If you got in at the price at the opening bell ($35.20) I hope you got out sometime before 11:30 am EST or so. At 4pm the stock closed at $34.19 a share. $1.01 below it’s price at the opening bell. Ah the auto industry. The more things change…..
    (More info here at autoblog.com)
  4. I generally read, but don’t post a lot of political news (unless it’s something worth mocking. Which most political stories qualify in some shape or form). This story stands on it’s own merits though. Why? Because it isn’t even political. It’s about Slurpees. And what *isn’t* good about a Slurpee, huh? Ok, besides the brain freeze, that is.
  5. Since this is the last “Five Thoughts” before Thanksgiving here in the states, I’m gonna use #5 today to wish everyone a very happy turkey day, and all that goes along with it. May your turkey dinner (or any substitute) turn out perfectly, may there be no rain on your Thanksgiving Day parade, and may your football team win it’s game (but if you’re trying to root for the Lions… you need help). Oh, and one word of warning… if the turkey is frozen…  DON’T put it in the deep fryer. Bad things will happen. Don’t believe me?

Ok, that’s five and I’m out of here. Since we led off by mentioning them… we’ll close out today with… The Peanuts!

Have a great weekend!
-Beer

Five Thoughts on a Friday – The new car smell edition

Good morning everyone, and welcome to another edition of our merit-less weekly feature, Five Thoughts on a Friday. Why the hate? No hate, just making sure that we never take this (or ourselves) too seriously! So with that said.. On with the fun!

  1. Let’s start off with a fun one. Earlier this week I finally got around to getting the post “On the Internet…” finished up and posted. And boy, am I glad I did. Because today I see Yahoo using a spin on my idea and promoting it on their front page! Theirs is dated May 12th. Our was posted on the 11th. We did it first! Neener! Neener! Of course, theirs will get much more traffic than ours, but at least we can have fun with having hit the publish button on ours before they did on theirs. It would also seem to indicate that we may seem to have a feel for timely issues. Now THAT is a scary though!
  2. I just have to ask… “How?” It appears Playboy is planning a “safe for work site“. So they’re going to finally, truly test that “I read it for the articles” argument? Let’s be honest, I hear Playboy, I think bunnies. And not Bugs Bunny, either. Playboy  = naked. Naked = Not safe for work. I’m guessing this one will be a swing and a miss.
  3. The whole fascination with Zombies has always really made me wonder about it. I just never understood it. Why zombies over skeletons, werewolves, etc.? Now I know. We have a confirmed zombie! Of course, it’s a rogue satellite, not a former person. Robot/mechanical zombies!  Everybody panic!
  4. I have to go with this one here, but not for the obvious reasons in the headline of the article. Yeah. If I was an attorney arrested for bringing drugs INTO a jail, I’d ask for a court appointed attorney, too. After all, it’s obvious the legal advice she was giving herself was….. Bad. Very, very bad. Not representing herself is probably the only smart choice she made all day.
  5. And we come to the new car smell point in the post. Why? Well, i just picked up a new car and it had me thinking. People seem to love their cars. They often become an extension of their personalities. Now, I’m not big on the customization thing. I go for the keep it clean and maintained route. Other people though, they buy accessories, get the cars painted, you name it. I had never seen anyone take it this far though! Ladies and gentleman, the Shark Truck! A shark. In a truck. Is that like Snakes on a Plane? Probably not.

Ok, that’s five and I’m ready to hit the weekend. One last shark comment though….  Land Shark!

<Sorry, the embedding isn’t working on this one. This was supposed to be the code to embed the classic SNL skit “Land Shark’, but it isn’t cooperating. Here’s the direct link for the video. Go, watch. Laugh. It is after all, a classic.>

Have a great weekend folks!
-Beer

Five Thoughts on a Friday… The (Insert witty phrase here) Edition

Another Friday is upon us. And just in time, we have five thoughts queued up and ready to go!

  1. It’s going to be a weekend without football. Sorry, the Pro Bowl doesn’t count. Especially with it not being in Hawaii this year. I thought the whole reason of having the Pro Bowl was a thinly veiled excuse for going to Hawaii.
  2. It’s great that technology has made it so easy for people to try to help, even in the smallest of ways with a disaster like the earthquake in Haiti. Just texting “Haiti” to 90999 will let you donate $10. That’s great, and incredibly easy. What bothers me is all the promos that I see after it. “Standard Messaging and Data rates may apply”. Wait, so you’ll make it incredibly easy for someone to donate – but then the cell companies want their cut of a text who’s only purpose is to try to help people in need? Sprint, Verizon, AT&T and the rest of you – shame on you. Here’s an idea folks… Go to http://www.redcross.org/ and donate $10.25 directly. Give THEM the extra cash the phone companies are charging.
  3. There’s “striking when the iron is hot” and then there’s perfect timing. Sears hit it perfect this week with the continuation of their ad campaign with Brett Favre lampooning himself on his decision making. The Vikings lost (Thus immediately commencing the “will he be back?” discussion), and what comes out in the online advertisements? The “Not Sure, Ask Brett” campaign – with Brett Favre shaking a magic “4” ball, complete with answers like “I’m not sure”. At least the guy has a sense of humor about it!
  4. There’s something very unique about the thermodynamics of Pop-tarts. Somehow, you can put them into a toaster at (for example) 350 degrees for 30 seconds. Yet somehow, when they come out of that 350 degree toaster – they are now closer to 500 degrees. How do they do that?
  5. Last week, as a joke – I tagged the Five Thoughts post with “cleavage” and “bikini” after laughing at a discussion of Warcraft armor models. We got 2 extra hits, one on each tag. So much for using tags like that to drive up traffic.  I know what we can go with! “Boobies!”

Ok folks, that’s 5 and as promised…. BOOBIES!

Blue Footed Boobies, no less!
What, you were expecting something else?

Later folks!
-Beer