Good morning everyone, and welcome to another hot, sweltering day here at Beerbarrel Productions. Yep, it’s hot. Looking at the map, it’s pretty much hot everywhere right now, but don’t worry! Relief is on the way! How can I be so sure? It’s simple really. There are only about 158 days until Christmas. Hey, I never said it was gonna cool down anytime soon, just that it would! And with that out of the way, let’s see what we can find for today, shall we?
- You know, when it gets hot and humid like it’s been around here, the bugs love it. Mosquitoes, june bugs, you name it. They all seem to be out in force right now. And when you have lots of bugs around, sometimes you need to take some more extreme measures to combat them. Using enough “bug bombs” to partially collapse a building though? I think you took the “bomb” part of the name a little too literally there…
- Speaking of buildings getting knocked down…. I guess nobody double checked the address, since a contractor in the Dallas/Ft. Worth area was hired to demolish a condemned home. Only to knock down the wrong house. That there is a big old “Texas-sized” whoops!
- This is the part of the post where I include something just because I think it’s cool. I went to a school that had a very prominent fencing program (Or so I’m told). Even then, I never paid much attention to it. I think it’s cool, I just don’t really ever think to myself “Hey, I should watch fencing”. Apparently I’m not alone in that. Enter a really fun, cool idea to try to get people to watch. A marketing campaign comparing it to sword fights in the movies.
As the guys from the Guinness ads would say… Brilliant!
- Switching gears into some at least marginally automotive related news, it seems like I can’t let a week go by these days without posting something about people being fired up about privacy. Like this article, that details how law enforcement agencies are tracking the movements of your license plate as you drive around.
- Lastly, just to be evil and give everyone nightmares, I’m including this one. Now, I’ve taken my fair share of vacations. And I’ve taken my fair share of grief for taking those trips from my co-bloggers who like to have fun with my vacation schedule right here on this very blog. This one though… note to self, NO vacations to Peru. Why you may ask? Because I don’t want to bring home a souvenir in the form of a flesh eating maggot inside my head! Yeah, you read that right. It was in her head!
Okay folks, that’s five and it’s time for me to hit the road. And if the police want to track my license plate, that’s fine. Heck, I could even consider it a public service. If they know where I usually go, and I end up somewhere I’m not familiar with, they’ll be able to tell me how to get there. Because obviously, I musta got lost. And with that, someone will finally understand who wubu gubu with the green teeth is…
Have a great weekend folks!
Posted in Feature
Tagged Beer's Boondoggles, Cars, Christmas, Commercials, Conspiracy, Features, Five Thoughts, From Beermaker's Brain, From the News, Silly, stupid, Travel, Vacation
Howdy folks! Welcome to this week’s edition of five thoughts. I meant to take notes this week, and have a bunch of fun stuff ready to go, I really did. Of course, you can all probably guess from the title how that all worked out. No notes. So we’re writing this one live! Hey, some bands are famous for their live performances! Yeah, not gonna aim for that though – besides… we’re a bit short on pyrotechnics here at the office. Anyway, on with today’s post!
- I see the King and PB got their picks up for the Stanley Cup finals this week. I’m still not watching, and was only vaguely aware of how was playing. I gotta wonder though… What happened to the guys from Cigars and Scotch? Did they get left out because they were beating up on the guys too much?
- Okay, I often post stuff “just because I can. And this might be one of those times. Or, some people might think it’s ‘cute’. I don’t. I think a 6 year old catching a massive tarpon is freaking awesome! I just have one question though… Did they have a tether on the little guy to keep him from being pulled into the water by that huge fish?
- Staying on, or maybe in this case, in the water… Another cool story popped up this week. It seems there’s an expedition that’s trying to find the wreck of the Griffin. The Griffin is a ship dating back to colonial times, that disappeared on Lake Michigan some 300 years ago. And folks, don’t let the name “Lake Michigan” fool you. It may be fresh water but it’s every bit as dangerous as an ocean.
- This one has to be from the “Where on earth to these people find the time to come up with this crap?” department. Apparently, someone got a burr in their saddle and decided to file a lawsuit to challenge the copyright of the song…… “Happy Birthday“. I’m telling you, you can’t make this crap up if you try!
- Lastly, what’s a Five Thoughts without a note about something automotive related? And this week, we have one. I like to call it… “How not to treat a car that’s worth $400,000“. And for those of you who don’t want to bother reading it since you probably already guessed what happened? We have a video! YIKES!!
Okay folks, that’s this week’s thrown together post and I’m off to enjoy what looks to be a nice weekend. Also – Happy Father’s Day to all you dads out there!
In the meantime, a little departure from some of the normal music. We’re gonna go with one that used to be in the tape deck of dad’s car growing up.
Have a great weekend folks!
Posted in Feature
Tagged Cars, Cool, Features, Fishing, Five Thoughts, From Beermaker's Brain, From the News, hockey, NHL, picks, playoffs, Silly
Wow, what a week in the world of the weird, wild, and wacky we’ve just had. Happy Friday everyone. We’ve had a lot of things to choose from this week, so in typical Beerbarrel fashion we’re going to throw together some random stories that will hopefully at least think about cracking a smile. Let’s get started on it, shall we?
- The problem with having such a wide variety of stories to pick from this week, is figuring out where to start. How about in the Savannah, GA area? That’s where researches have finally found the location of a missing colonial area fort. Now, I realize it wasn’t all that large, and it was way back in the day, and there was – you know – a war going on at the time… But how exactly does one go about losing the location of a fort??? “It was JUST HERE! I swear, this is where we left it!” Still, thought it was cool, so I figured I would pass it along.
- It seems that even as a former commander-in-chief, there are a few things that are still out of President Clinton’s reach. Including being able to talk Led Zepplin into reuniting. Maybe he just didn’t use the correct approach. Maybe he should have said he was “On a mission from God“? Worked for these guys…
- If you spend anytime reading back through this blog, you’ll see that we’ve mentioned a run of bad events on cruise ships. All of them applying to Carnival cruise lines. You know, running aground in Italy, engine fires and overflowing toilets at sea, breaking lose at the dock, failed inspections, and now… two people going overboard offshore of Australia. I don’t know about you, but I think you’d have a hard time convincing me to even set foot on one of their boats right now. They keep trying to come back though. And every time I read another one of these stories, all I can think of is Mickey’s advice to Rocky in the original movie. “Down, stay down!” In otherwords, waive the white flag already folks. Change your name, something, anything!
- I always like to be able to include something about cars in these posts. I always like to include something from the “You’re not real bright, are you?” department in these posts. Every now and then, those two meet up to provide an ideal entry to use in this space. I think the title says it all… Watch A Corvette-Driving Idiot Fail At Donuts Then Commit Hit-And-Run.
- Lastly, this comes to us under the “It’s been done” heading. Big headline – “Man uses spoon to break out of Russian maximum-security prison“. The article goes on to link to another article, and describes how “using only a spoon” to dig a hole through the cell’s ceiling and escape. The authors seem very impressed by that. Apparently they don’t remember the movie “Escape From Alcatraz“. As I mentioned… It’s been done.
Okay folks, that’s five and I’m out of here. Time to go get the boat tuned up and ready to go fishing. That’s right, Beer’s out again next week. A fishing boondoggle is on tap. Don’t worry though, I’ll make sure to leave to blog in good hands. Heck, the guys will probably need to do another round of picks here soon anyways. In the meantime, since we closed with a Clint Eastwood reference, let’s go with that today!
Have a great weekend!
Posted in Feature
Tagged Blues Brothers, Cars, Commentary, Features, Five Thoughts, From Beermaker's Brain, From the News, Just for Fun, Movies, Music, stupid
Howdy folks, and welcome to another edition of Five Thoughts! I’m back again this week to guide you through another silly post. So, let’s get started rambling through another one of Beermaker’s rambling rants about what’s going on in the news of the weird (at least according to Beer’s Brain) this week.
- Let’s start with this one. I’m really trying to figure this one out. A woman in Chicago is fighting a $100,000 parking fine. It appears her ex-boyfriend abandoned a car at an airport parking lot, where it piled up the fines over three years. So… you didn’t notice the car was gone for three years? You didn’t report it stolen? One day three years on you suddenly remembered “Oh! I know where we left the car!”??? Or you just wanted to get rid of it, and dumping it an at airport parking lot seemed easier than calling one of those charities that will come get it from your house??? This is definitely one where there’s got to be more to this story.
- There are times during everyone’s life when they wonder if someone is even paying attention. Like when someone tries to merge into your lane on the expressway – right into the spot your vehicle is currently occupying. Or, you know… when it turns out that those toy poodles you bought after wanting them for so long… turn out to be ferrets on steroids. Yes, you read that right. Ferrets. On Steroids. Sounds like a bad B movie title (You know, like Snakes on a Plane). They didn’t look odd to you at all when you bought them, right?
- Speaking of not paying attention. When I read this article and watched the video I thought most of it was very cool. How else would you describe a close encounter with a huge shark while you’re on a kayak doing some fishing? But then there’s a the part in the video where he brings (what’s left of) the fish up towards and almost onto the kayak. And so I have to ask… were you not paying attention? Did you not see the size of the shark? Did you not notice that it likes that fish, and is roughly the same size as your kayak? I really don’t think you want it coming aboard.
- Changing gears… We’ve made no secret that we like old cars around here. And when something comes along that can combine some the vehicles we thought were cool growing up with the TV shows and movies we thought were cool? Even better. And when they’re from Hot Wheels, which means we don’t have to plan on hitting the lottery to afford them? Well, that gets mentioned here. Because This is cool. Hot Wheels Retro Entertainment series memorializes your favorite Hollywood cars. The link is worth a click just for the picture in the article.
- Lastly, despite all of my boondoggles I don’t really consider myself a worldly person. I certainly don’t consider myself a diplomat or a peacemaker. That being said..I think I finally have it figured out. I know why North Korea is always so cranky. Turns out, there’s a BEER SHORTAGE in North Korea. I was reading an article about a group that tried to set up a brewery in North Korea and this line caught my eye, “They can’t produce enough for the domestic market”. Don’t they know beer promotes love? And not just the beer-goggle type. I’m talking down to earth “I love you, man” statements.
Okay folks, that’s five and I’m out of here. And then I mean out of here. I mean “Look for a guest writer next week because I’m off on another boondoggle” gone. Yep, As a late winter storm draws a bead on our state I’m drawing a line in the sand. On a beach. Someplace warm. You know, down in that One Particular Harbor.
Have a great weekend folks!
Posted in Feature
Tagged Beer, Beer's Boondoggles, Cars, Commercials, Features, Fishing, Five Thoughts, From Beermaker's Brain, From the News, Sharks, Television, Vacation
Howdy folks! Beer’s back from yet another boondoggle to bring you this week’s edition of Five Thoughts. A big thank you to PB for filling in for me last week while I was out of town. I came back with an idea of what I wanted to call this week’s post, and then life decided to trow even more ideas at me – until I had more titles for this post than I could use. And that’s how we landed where we did. So, what’s going on today? Well, let’s find out!
- A lot going on here in town today as it’s the home opener for the Detroit Tigers. The home opener is virtually a holiday here. Always a huge crowd at the ballpark, and an even bigger crowd downtown outside the ballpark. And that’s great for the team, great for the city, great for almost everyone. One person lost out today though. Last night a young man from the University of Detroit won the NCAA college basketball slam dunk competition. And while Yahoo Sports has a story on it, it was nowhere to be seen on the front pages of the local Detroit paper sites. So I’m putting it here. Because I can.
- On a completely different note – I saw this story in the news lately. Talk about a company bound and determined to put itself in bankruptcy. After everything that’s gone wrong lately, when I read a headline that says “Crews corral cruise ship that tore loose“, I could only think of one cruise line. And yep, if you said Carnival you would be correct. I think people would be more willing to cruise on the Exxon Valdez if it were still around than they would be to get on a Carnival cruise at this point.
- Staying on the water for a moment. You aren’t gonna need a bigger boat this time. You might however, just give up on going in the water altogether. Especially when you see the nearly 7 foot long, 102 pound barracuda this guy caught. Barracuda are bad news at 10-20 pounds. At 100? Eek. Come to the great lakes folks – our fish don’t (and aren’t capable of it) try to eat you!
- Slowly but surely, and despite the massive ice flows I saw on the Straights of Mackinac last weekend all the signs of spring are slowly arriving. The robins are back, baseball is back, and I’m getting the annual hot rod bug. And seeing that ‘Eleanor‘ from “Gone in 60 Seconds” is going up for auction certainly isn’t helping.
- Lastly, since I just love ‘news of the odd, I have to include this one. Of course, sometimes the odd stuff can be a bit scary. Or hairy. Or in this case, both. Now, what could be both? How about a large species of tarantula, roughly the size of an adult human face? Yeah. That’s what I thought, too. To anyone who has a real fear of spiders? Sorry about the nightmares. You um…. might want to avoid Sri Lanka.
Okay folks, that’s five and I’m off to enjoy the opening day festivities. And really, given the events of today, there’s only one song to go with. I just wish I was sitting out there in Centerfield.
Have a great weekend folks!
Posted in Feature
Tagged Beer's Boondoggles, Cars, Detroit, Features, Five Thoughts, From Beermaker's Brain, From the News, Holiday, MLB, Mustang, Spiders
Howdy folks, and welcome to today’s edition of Five Thoughts. We’re going to go a bit literal today. As opposed to literary, which I don’t think we’ll ever be accused of. Anyways, since we featured so much food type talk last time, why don’t we see what’s cooking this week!
- Apparently they’ve never heard of the Heart Attack Grill. It could have saved them some time, and probably money. You see, a new study has shown that eating bacon and other processed meats can increase your risk of premature death. To these researches I say.. Wasn’t that already pretty obvious?” Also, isn’t it pretty obvious that people would prefer to die sooner WITH bacon, than live a long life without it?
- Again… I have to ask, “wasn’t it obvious?” It didn’t occur to a single person that printing bible verses on rolls of toilet paper might offend some people who were likely to make a big deal out of it? You thought people would just “roll with it”? (And, wasn’t it obvious I was setting up for a bad joke on that one?)
- it should be obvious… that being based around the remains of the Motor City, we pride ourselves on kind being car guys. Or at least fans of some of the classics. And it should also be obvious to the writers at Yahoo! that if you’re going to list “10 Iconic Hollywood Cars” and include the 1977 Pontiac Trans Am from Smokey and the Bandit on the list, that car guys are going to spot the fact that the photo of a Trans Am you have shown is distinctly NOT a 1977 Trans Am. It’s the Tans Am that ran from 1979-1981.
Here’s the 1977-1978 Trans Am – notice the front end! (Thanks to wikipedia for the photo)
Here’s what Yahoo! ran…
The sad thing is, the Yahoo! photo appears to be from a parade of Firebirds/Trans Ams. Which means they probably COULD have easily gotten a correct photo.
- And in news out of Florida this week (No, we’re not picking on Florida with this one), researchers tagged a fourteen and a half foot long great white shark weighing in at about 2000 pounds just off of Jacksonville. And after reading that said shark was caught and tagged in only 25 (!!!) feet of water, It should be obvious… It’s not safe to go back in the water! (You thought I was going for the bigger boat quote there, didn’t you?)
- Lastly, it should be obvious that we all hear FAR too much bad news on a daily basis. I suppose it’s a function of the 24/7 news cycle world we all live in. So, that being said… I personally think it should be obvious to be reminded every now and then that there are still decent human beings around every once in a while. People who do the right/nice thing.. just because they can. Like the United Airlines staff that held a plane at a gate for one passenger. So he could make the flight and get home. To see his dying mother one last time. Cheers to them.
Okay folks, it should be obvious that that’s five. And with that, it should be obvious that I’m ready to start the weekend. As one of my co-blogger’s reminded me, “It’s no Boondoggle” and it’s not, but it’s still a weekend, so I’ll take it. In the meantime, I’ll just keep thinking about being down in the Islands.
Have a great weekend folks!
Good morning everyone, and welcome to our first Five Thoughts of the new year. We’ve got a bit of a mixed bag here today, but before I get started let me thank Kingkielbasa for filling in for me last week (even though he did take a shot or two at me in his post) while I was out of town. No, let’s see what we can dig up for this week.
- It’s been a while since Hurricane Sandy hit the east coast. And even the great lakes area (Toronto, Detroit, Grand Rapids, Chicago, etc..). But the brunt of the damage was definitely on the eastern seaboard, where it became known as “Superstorm Sandy”. The damage was massive, to the point of being hard to quantify. I think this may help a bit though. Keep in mind, these are runways for commercial air traffic, just to provided some scale / reference. And they are jammed full of cars that were flooded and/or damaged by the storm.
- Seeing as how we just posted our NFL playoff picks yesterday (And since we don’t really expect to be picking any NHL playoffs anytime soon) I figured I might talk a little bit more football here today. Last Monday was “Black Monday” in the NFL with 7 head coaches being let go. Now, it’s no secret that our local team is not so good. But I have to laugh. There are people around here who want our coach fired. There is pleading for one of two established coaches that just hit the market to be brought in. The thing is… this two coaches run systems that the fans here just a few seasons back screamed to the heavens to get rid of! Now they want them back? Sheesh!
- When I saw this one, I thought maybe it was going to be about the John Lennon Christmas Song at first. But no, it’s not. And I have to say, I’m shocked, SHOCKED! to find out that there was a false article on Wikipedia. I thought if it was on the internet, it had to be true!
- I can’t help but go with this one. It seems the Vatican has gone ‘Cash Only’ for tourists after its electronic payment systems were blocked by their processing bank. Now, say what you want about them needing to comply with banking rules an all that, but really – shouldn’t a faith based institution trust you when you say you’re good for it on an IOU? Ba-dum-bum!
- I don’t think a rimshot is quite right for this next one. Hey, I know the joke is that Utah is behind the times and all, but when school officials are trying to shut down a school play due to racy lyrics from the Elvis song ‘All Shook Up’ well… What, they’re stuck in the 1950’s? I didn’t think it was that bad out there. And for them, we don’t go with the rimshot. Fortunately, I do know what to go with. Sorry Utah, You lose.
Okay, that’s five and I’m out of here. I’m off to enjoy the weekend and some football. And just for those folks in Utah, here you go.
Have great weekend folks!