Howdy folks, and happy December to you all. Did you get enough to eat last weekend? Still eating leftovers? Did you survive shopping on black Friday if you went? Personally, I think I’m just now starting to come out of the food coma I put myself into. Anyhow, let’s get cracking and see what five things we can think up and mock today, shall we?
- It’s now December 2011. That means we’re now less than a month from 2012. You know, the year the Mayans got to when they were making their calendar and stopped. Prompting theories that 2012 will prove to be the end of the world. And now, we have undeniable proof that may well be the case.
Remember the band Hanson from the 90’s? They sang that MmmmBop song? Well, now they’re coming out with an “MmmHop” Beer. Yeah, if that isn’t a sign of the apocalypse I don’t know what is.
- Staying on drinks here for a bit, now that we’re heading into the holidays it’s time to start planning this year’s egg nog hunt. No, I’m not talking about that stuff from the supermarket. No, I’m not going to make my own. I go out and hunt down some from a local dairy. It’s the type that’s so damned thick it defies any attempt to mix in a nice dark rum or bourbon into it. Unless you do it right. THAT’S the kind of egg nog I’m going hunting for.
- This one is a bit of a buzzkill. It’s not holiday related at all. It’s about how our smartphones are logging our data. All of it. Without an opt-out function. Bah, Humbug indeed. Not cool folks, not cool.
- Back into a more jolly mode for this one. In an effort to become a more helpful blog, we’ve decided pass along a link to guide for ‘Gifting the gamer in your life‘ from CNN. It’s far from the only list out there, but there are some decent suggestions to be had if you need help finding a game for someone.
- And once you’re done with all that shopping (Hopefully well before December 23rd or 24th), it’s time to kick back and relax. One of my favorite choices is, of course, beer! So with that in mind, Imbibe has a listing of their “Best Holiday Beers“. Be warned though, as some of the beers on that list have a kick of their own, with some hitting 14% alcohol by volume. Ho Ho Ho!
Okay folks, that’s Five and I’m ready to start the weekend. And on the way out, just because we like the song around here…. It’s a Marshmallow World!
Have a great weekend folks!
“Um.. Beer? You know it’s not even Thanksgiving yet, right? It isn’t the end of the year, it’s not really even all that close to it.”
Hush, and let me explain. No, there is too much. Let me sum up.
Anyways, it’s the last Friday before Thanksgiving in the United States. Next week is Black Friday. With that, the holiday season is off and running and there’s no stopping it. By the time you blink it will be Christmas and then the year will be over. So everyone, take a deep breath and say goodbye to 2011. Because after this weekend, you aren’t going to have time. Anyways, on to today’s post! (I had actually intended to go a bit video game centric in today’s post. What with doing the Star Wars: The Old Republic weekend test last weekend and all. Then the reviews from the LA Auto show started to show up online. And my inner gear-head got all cranked up again. So, let’s start with cars.)
- News from
Bizzaro Land, um Los Angeles. The old rules of the known automotive universe no longer apply. Nissan now has a production car (The 2013 GT-R) that will do 0-60mph in 2.7 seconds. I’m gussing it will also get you a speeding ticket in roughly the same amount of time. Not to be outdone (But a completely different type of vehicle), Ford Motor company whipped up some sort of alternate universe Shelby GT500 that has 650 horsepower, will push the 200mph barrier, and… doesn’t get hit with the gas guzzler tax!!??!?!?!! How is that even possible (Don’t get me wrong though, I highly encourage this type of thing!)?
(Both links are worth following, just for the pictures of the cars)
- From the land of “Apparently Hollywood is never going to learn, or admit they have no new ideas”… NBC has not only accepted a script…but has ordered the production of a pilot. Of the Munsters. Listen, I liked the original Munsters a lot. I love the Munstermobile (Both of them actually, don’t forget Grandpa’s ride!).
But Hollywood, let it go, folks. Frankly, I’m shocked that they aren’t doing a reality TV show for the casting of the pilot. Oh crap, I hope I didn’t just give them an idea.
- Doing the segue… Speaking of pilots (Of a different type). A bit of a scary moment turned comical the other day when the truth finally got out. The captain went to the restroom, where he got stuck due to a faulty door latch. The poor co-pilot, who got left alone to wonder why the captain wasn’t coming back got a message from a passenger. Frankly, I can see some people getting upset when they hear the audio, and I can understand it. But I can also see the co-pilot’s point of view. He opens that door, and control of the plane is at risk. The captain though, I feel for him. How would you like to be known from now on as “The pilot who caused an emergency landing by getting stuck in the bathroom”. He’s going to have to own that one, because there’s no avoiding it. But hey, when you gotta go, you gotta go.
- Switching back over to gaming, as I tweeted earlier in the week, I had a blast testing out the Star Wars game last weekend. And I see there are tons of giveaways for beta keys for the next test weekend now. I think it’s going to be a very good game. Will it threaten Warcraft? I don’t know. WoW has it’s own big content patch coming soon (4.3). Looks like there may be some gaming to be done here in the near future. I’ve also stumbled across The Godfather: Five Families and will give that a look, but I’m expecting to see something akin to mafia wars on Facebook. We’ll see if I’m right or wrong.
- Back to television for a moment. I miss “That 70’s Show”. Why do I miss it? I miss it because I miss Red. He got it. He understood that if you’re going to host a pornographic website, as a teacher you probably shouldn’t use your SCHOOL DISTRICT ISSUED LAPTOP to work on it. If you do, that makes you, as Red would say… A Dumbass.
Okay folks. That’s Five and I’m ready to get the weekend (and the end of the year) started. By this time next week we’ll all be in holiday mode. Or a food coma, which is kind of the same thing. Anyways, no music this week. Instead we’re going to let William Shatner make sure you all stay safe if you’re looking to fry a turkey this year. There was no way I wasn’t using this video.
Have a great weekend folks!
Posted in Feature
Tagged Autoblog, Cars, Features, Five Thoughts, From the News, Holiday, Porn, postaweek2011, Silly, Star Wars, stupid, Video Games, World of Warcraft
Thanksgiving is rolling towards us, and when it comes to this holiday, there’s really only one holiday special that comes to mind. The old WKRP “Turkeys Away” episode.
Yes, it has some commercials, but it’s totally worth watching. Like the post title says, it’s a Thanksgiving classic. After all, you get to hear the line “As God as my witness, I thought turkeys could fly”.
Have fun, eat candy, be safe! But watch out for things that go ‘bump’ in the night…
Just don’t get too scared out there, unless you hear something like this.
Then, you’d best start running….
Howdy folks, and happy Friday. I’ll be honest. I was not looking forward to writing this post today. Why? Well, it means I’m back from vacation. (Um.. Beer.. you already posted about vacation..) Yes. Yes I did. But this is the first real post that I felt obligated to do. The notes from the road was just for fun. Still, it’s Friday… so let’s see what Beer’s got rattling around in his brain (Other than rocks, you mean?) Hey! I heard that! Anyhow – let’s get started.
- I was going to start in on the back to reality theme, and how hard it is.. Blah, blah blah. Then the news went and hit the “Easy” button for me. How can you not lead with a news item that involves “trouser snake” puns and jokes? Yes, it’s an article about people putting snakes in their pants. And the best part? One of those people got caught at the Miami airport. Meaning they were trying to get snakes… on a plane! Which of course is an excuse to post this!
Ok, yes. I used the TV edit version to avoid being too crude. Want the original? It’s right here.
- Ran across this little blurb dealing with an NFL player’s contract. (Pro football salaries are about as far from reality as it gets for most of us). This is the line that really gets me:
“We certainly are not unhappy with our contract. Do we believe we outperformed the contract? Absolutely. Did we expect to outperform the contract. Sure. Are we bitter or unhappy? Not at all,”
That was said by the player’s AGENT. Dude.. who’s this WE? How many sacks did you have? HE outperformed his deal. Singular. The guy on the field. There is no “We”.
Oh what the hell.. Since it looks like the guy is going to get a new contract, let’s go one more. Yeah, I’m going there.
- CNN has an article up about being a Swedish chef. It’s a pretty interesting read and some of the stuff does really sound good. But I have to admit, and I’m sure it’s why the link from the main page was “Be a real Swedish chef”, that once you read “Swedish Chef” we all thought of just one thing….
- This caught my eye over on Autoblog. Is it car related? I guess if you consider stunt people getting hit by cars “car related”. But it was pretty funny (language is not PG though, so careful at work). And since this has Lee Majors in it:
I couldn’t help but slip this one in, too…
- You didn’t think you were getting away without me making a Labor Day reference, did you? What in the world *IS* Labor day, anyways? According to the Department of Labor “It constitutes a yearly national tribute to the contributions workers have made to the strength, prosperity, and well-being of our country.” Thankfully with all the job losses recently, we haven’t had to make a concession on the holiday just yet. (Annnd THAT’S about as close to a political statement as I am going to make!) What does it mean? Well, it means a long weekend. It means things like grilling and camping and campfires. It means FOOTBALL!! Isn’t that enough reason to celebrate? I think so.
Ok, that’s five and a metric ton of video embeds. Now that I’ve gotten back from vacation hopefully I’ll have that out of my system for a while. But probably not. Either way, as we head into the long holiday weekend I need to pay one last tribute to my recent Bahamian vacation and the events that transpired. Yeah, I’m talking about Irene. And yeah, you better look away now if you don’t want to hear what’s coming next because I’m going there…
Have a great holiday weekend, folks!
Posted in Feature
Tagged Features, Five Thoughts, football, From Beermaker's Brain, From the News, Holiday, Muppets, postaweek2011, Silly, Television, Vacation