Five Thoughts on a Friday – The “End of the short week” Edition

Good morning folks, and welcome to yet another edition of Five Thoughts. We’re off and running again this morning, just waiting to get the weekend started. So without fiddling around too much in this space here this morning, let’s get at it shall we?

1. I like to think I understand the basics of business and marketing pretty well. Especially considering the diplomas on the wall that say I’m supposed to. As such, I totally get the point, economically speaking, that the author is trying to make in this article about McDonald’s possibly needing to abandon the $1 burger on its dollar menu due to increased costs. They simply aren’t making enough money on it to keep it around. But when you bust out a line that says.. “McDonald’s needs to start charging $1.50 or $2 for Dollar Menu items , Peter Saleh, an analyst at Telsey Advisory Group”…
   I’m just curious, do you GET the whole point of a DOLLAR menu? Things are supposed to cost a DOLLAR. If they cost more, then they aren’t on the DOLLAR menu anymore. See how that works? Glad I could clear it up for you.
2. Changing gears completely….  We’ve all seen these NSA online snooping stories… And I’m sure a bunch of people feel safe now because they either were using, or started using a bunch of extra encryption software to protect their data. Well, guess what… Now there’s news that the NSA can crack most anything you might be using. So that helicopter you thought you heard last night when you were surfing the web… Yeah, probably the Feds.  Maybe you used the wrong keywords…
   
3. Next up, from the “I’m including this because I think it’s funny and scary at the same time” department…. You’re at home, having breakfast. The car you just sold is sitting in the driveway, waiting for its new owner to pick it up. And here comes a semi trailer with 45 TONS of sand rolling backwards down the road. Over your car and into your house. Yeah, I’d say you’re awake after that.
4. Next up…. drones! Yes, I’ve posted my fair share of stories about them. I find the technology very interesting. And the “privacy” debate is interesting. This though, this is humorous. All I’m going to add though, as a Colorado town considers passing an ordinance that will allow people with a license to shoot down drones (And they are currently flooded with applications for the licenses), are those infamous words…. This. Will. Not. End Well.
5. So a funny thing happened before the football game last night…. Sounds like a set-up for a punchline, you know? Aside from the weather delay, one of the stories coming out of the game (OTher than the game itself) was the shot NBC got of the Baltimore Ravens being patted down before the game. Turns out it’s a normal occurrence, designed to check for banned substances like grease or silicon (Which in theory could make someone harder to tackle, I guess). Although I’m still unsure how grease would help when you have a 300 pound missile leading with its helmet looking to remove you from your shoes. Oh well, that’s why I only watch the games on TV.

Okay folks, that’s five and I am about ready to get my weekend started, how about you? In the meantime, if things are still a bit off schedule from the holiday weekend last week like they are around here. Just remember, this morning was not the normal Garbage day. It’s tomorrow. See what I did there?

Have a great weekend folks!
-Beer

Five Thoughts on a Friday -“Hello Everybody”

Hello everybody!  I’ve finally been able to make a return appearance writing for the blog.  So since, Beer is off on one of his famous boondoggles, I’m starting this blog off with a video to just say hello everybody….

1.  Since it’s been a very somber week, I really don’t want
to bring anyone else down any further. However, after reading about this individual I need to let people know about him.  I do have to admit that I’m not sure I’d be hanging out with this guy though going forward. I mean I’ve heard of bad luck, but I think this fella needs to lock himself in his house and not leave for a little while.

2.  It’s a miracle.  How could 2 teams, unknown “experts” and sports fans have not figured out the problem?  Man, I’m glad this guy knew what to do and why is he not employeed by a team somewhere if this is true??

3. Yeah, I got nothing for this clip.  It just cracks me up.

4. You know, you’d think as humans we’d learn from our mistakes. Heck, you’d think that we’d learn from others mistakes even better because we all know we like to say stuff like, “Man, what were they thinking?” In the wake of some dumb advertising choices lately, you’d think you’d really watch your procedures and protocols. I’m guessing this ad agency wasn’t doing that.

5.  Okay, I’d like to take a moment and apologizes to our normal readers.  Those that have been with us through the years know my hatred for Hollywoods remakes.  I’m about to eat crow people….this looks like a fantastic summer “shut the brain down” enjoyable movie that I can’t wait for:

Okay folks.  Sorry as this is not up to the normal Beer standards as he’s off on his boondoggle and I’ve got to get my typing fingers back in the groove of things.  I think I need to finish this post though with a song in honor of the Beer having fun. Hmmm, I think he’ll be using this song title alot:

Five Thoughts on a Friday – The rambling Beermaker edition

Hiya folks. After a long, long week we arrive at… another Friday! And that means it’s time to crank out another edition of Five Thoughts. That’s always a good way to pass some time. Let’s get right at it, shall we?

1. The sports headlines of the day are being dominated by the NFL labor talks right now. We’re skipping that and flashing back to an NHL game last Saturday night (2/26/2011). Why? Well, we haven’t talked hockey in a while, and this shootout ended on a shot reminiscent of one of my favorite commercials. Check it out…  Off the stick, off the crossbar, off the goalies back (?!?!?), and into the net.
   
2. Last week I talked about the last fight of the US space shuttle program. Turns out I was one off (I know, I know, I hear that about me a lot!). There’s one more flight/mission. Discovery is done though. Why I am I bringing it up anyways? Because if they aren’t going to use shuttles anymore, NASA is gonna need to get better at launching rockets again. The latest one ended up in the Pacific Ocean. Call it a hunch, but I don’t think that’s where they were aiming.
3. This quote really says it all:
   “We haven’t been seeing a lot of Ronald McDonald,” said Tim Calkins, a marketing professor at Northwestern University in Evanston, Illinois. “They’re beginning to appeal to much more sophisticated individuals.”
   Seriously man. You just used “sophisticated individuals” in a sentence talking about McDonald’s? Seriously?
4. We’ve seen cars recalled for any number of things before. Ignition cylinders, suspension components, wiring, etc.. By definition a recall will fall into safety or emissions related fields to qualify, anything else is just a voluntary callback by the manufacturer. Why do I mention this? Because Mazda may have just qualified for one of the creepiest recalls yet. Spiders. Spiders in your car. Kinda like Snakes on a Plane, when you think about it.
5. How can you not love an article running with the headline “Revenge of the low-flow toilets“? It would seem that San Fransisco is dealing with a little thing called “The Law of Unintended Consequences“. Or in this case… a really bad stench! But hey, any excuse to introduce toilet humor into a post, right?

Ok, that’s five (very random!) thoughts. Who else is ready to start the weekend? Let’s get to it then. On our way out, something a bit out of line with the stuff we usually try to close with. See what happens when Beermaker gets to play with the scan button on the radio?

Have a great weekend folks!
-Beer

Five Thoughts on a Friday – The Let it Be edition

Uh oh… Is Beer getting ready to go all Beatlemania on something today? No, not really. We’ll just see where this one leads today. Can’t believe it’s Friday again already, guess short weeks can do that to you. Especially when your co-blogger didn’t realize you weren’t going to be in the office on Tuesday, either.

So without further delay, it’s time for today’s Five Thoughts….

1. I always knew there was an idiot out there for everything. Heck, I’ve always been a firm believer that whenever you make the world idiot proof the world will just go and make a better idiot. Here’s the proof. Picketing a spelling bee? Seriously? Man, you need help.
2. Staying on the idiot theme for a moment. I don’t mention this one to debate the right or wrong of the attempt at a phantom recall. I want to talk about this memo. Here’s the deal. Anyone who’s come within 30 feet of a business school has heard about the disastrous GM side saddle fuel tank memo. These people went to school they had to have heard about it. Besides that, common sense flat out says YOU DO NOT PUT $HIT LIKE THAT IN A WRITING. End of discussion. To whoever wrote that memo? You’re an idiot, first class.
3. The king sent this one to me, and to be honest – I don’t want to know what he was searching for when he found it. The headline speaks for itself though… Sword-Wielding Porn Actor Kills One, Hurts Two. Yeah, I can’t top that. Nor do I want to.
4. Oops. McDonald’s is recalling a bunch of the new Shrek glasses. I guess using a known carcinogen (Cadmium) in paint for drinking glasses is a bad idea. Who knew? This story would have been MUCH cooler if it had been some sort of radioactive contamination, you know? Then the kids could glow green, just like Shrek! (Ok, I know, that was bad.)
5. And here it is. You knew I wasn’t going to let this week by without throwing in my two cents (Just like everyone else on the planet) on *the* sports story of the week. Armando Galarraga, of the Detroit Tigers pitched a perfect game Wednesday night. Except for one small thing, the box score shows he gave up a hit. See, the umpire blew the call. Here’s the issue I have… It *was* a perfect game. In fact, he went 28 up, 28 down. One more than needed. The umpire has admitted he blew the call, and profusely apologized. I take issue with only one thing. It *was* a perfect game. Stop describing it as “near perfect”. Everyone knows he went 27 up, 27 down. You don’t have to make it “official”, just stop calling it “near perfect”. Call it the “perfect game with the blown call” if you want to. That would work.  And for the record, I tip my cap to the pitcher and to the umpire on this whole deal. They defined being accountable, and classy in their actions after the game.

So there we have it for today. Considering the way I started, maybe it should have been the “Let it rip” or “let it fly” edition. But no, I think the Beatles said it best. Major League Baseball, Commissioner Selig, it appears you’re not going to overturn the ruling on the field for Armando Galarraga’s perfect game. To that, I say “you’re getting it right, please don’t. Let it be.” That game is far better defined by what happened that night and the actions of the the men involved if it’s left to stand on its own as it is. Let it be.

Have a great weekend folks!
-Beer

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What the heck happened to my commercials?

This year’s crop of Superbowl commercials gets the official Beerbarrel “Meh” rating. Overall, there were far more disappointments than there were home runs. Here’s our quick overview/rundown of some of the high and low lights.

The big, controversial, “Pro Life” ad with Tim Tebow and his mother? Harmless, and more or less boring. Some lady comes on the screen and just starts talking – and I turn my head and start talking to the people I was watching the game with. More or less missed it.

All I’m going to say on this subject is this… there was a stretch of commercials where there was a disturbing lack of pants. Tighty Whities do not belong on television like that. Now those ads… THOSE ads were offensive.

The cheetah print thong in the remake of the Chicago Bears Superbowl Shuffle? Also offensive. (This is what that once feared football team has been reduced to? Shades of Little Richard shilling for Taco Bell back in the 90s.)

One company could save a lot of money by not shooting the same commercial over and over again. You know the one – the one that’s “Too hot for TV”. The “See what happens next on our website” routine gets old after 6-7 years, folks.

The US government ran an advertisement for the upcoming census. And in true bureaucratic form, they spent a lot of money and probably didn’t accomplish anything. (Ok, Ok, I’ll get off the soapbox)

And I’m sorry to have to say this, because I thought the commercial was fantastic. A great joke, and sort of a modernized send up of one of the all time Superbowl commercial greats, but I have a feeling there’s a large chunk of the audience that just did not get the McDonald’s commercial. We closed out 5 thoughts with it on Friday. If you watch the original first, the new one makes a lot more sense.

Original:

New One:

But hey… At least we got a great game to watch in between the commercials this year!

Later Folks!
-Beer

Five Thoughts on a Friday, the “I heard there was some sort of football game this weekend” edition

It’s Friday again folks, and that means it’s time for Five Thoughts. For the record, I believe this post now holds the title for longest “post title” on the blog.

1. It seems Wayne Newton forgot where he left his plane. The folks at the Oakland County airport haven’t forgotten about it though, or the storage fees.  Hey, if you’re going to abandon an airplane – an airport might not be a bad place to do it. I mean, who’s going to notice one more plane right away… right? Danke schön there, Wayne.
   
2. It’s amazing how disruptive little things can be in an office. Little things like the cleaning crew coming and shutting down the restrooms for cleaning at a different,  random time each day. C’mon! Pick a time and stick with it so we can schedule these things, ok? We live off of outlook calendars here. We don’t do well with random times!
3. Been an awfully rough week for Toyota. Still, it was probably to be expected. After all, everyone loves to take a shot at the champ. Heck, even the US Secretary of Transportation got into the act for a bit, initially telling people not to drive their cars. Funny how they always say that stuff, then pull back a bit isn’t it?
4. This could probably have been a post all on it’s own, but we’ll mention it here. This doesn’t apply to most workplaces, but if you work somewhere where a coworker might be filming a television segment (with you in the background) and you want a demonstration of what NOT to do… Watch the video in this story.
5. And lastly, there’s the tiny little football game being played in Miami this weekend. The Beerbarrel’s prediction for the game? Our prediction is… pain.  No no, Just kidding. Our official prediction is that the first commercial after the opening kickoff will belong to Anheiser Busch. (Of course, having said that, watch it be Pepsi)

What, you didn’t think we actually had any insight on the actual GAME, did you?

We’ll close up with one of the great Superbowl ads of all time… “Nothing but net”

Have a great weekend folks!
-Beer